Every problem is an opportunity to trust God.
I have a problem. I have been on the wagon for a while now but I fell off this weekend. I was feeling really lonely and my self esteem has plummeted. I know there is no place to go but forward. I know there is nothing I can do but NOT do it again. The thing that bothers me the most is that I have let down Daniel. I have, once again, let down the person who I care about the most. I have told Daniel before that I was never going to drink again and every single time I have done it again. When I say it now he doesn't believe me and I don't blame him. I have proven that "talk is cheap" and now I don't know what to do. I don't want to say it again because I don't even believe myself anymore. I don't feel like a very good person right now. I want to find a good church and a local AA chapter in Fairbanks. I want to prove myself right. I want to show Daniel that I am a good person. I feel that the only one who believes in me is God and I honestly think he shouldn't believe in me either. I have proven too many times that I am not someone to believe in because all I do is let people down.
I have a problem. I have been on the wagon for a while now but I fell off this weekend. I was feeling really lonely and my self esteem has plummeted. I know there is no place to go but forward. I know there is nothing I can do but NOT do it again. The thing that bothers me the most is that I have let down Daniel. I have, once again, let down the person who I care about the most. I have told Daniel before that I was never going to drink again and every single time I have done it again. When I say it now he doesn't believe me and I don't blame him. I have proven that "talk is cheap" and now I don't know what to do. I don't want to say it again because I don't even believe myself anymore. I don't feel like a very good person right now. I want to find a good church and a local AA chapter in Fairbanks. I want to prove myself right. I want to show Daniel that I am a good person. I feel that the only one who believes in me is God and I honestly think he shouldn't believe in me either. I have proven too many times that I am not someone to believe in because all I do is let people down.
posted by Tater at 9:55 AM
2 Comments:
Guess what, the only one you can trust completely is the Lord. He knows what your future holds Tara, and I know He's got big plans for you. You can not fix yourself on your own. It will only be through God's strength that you make it through this hard time. All you have to do is trust Him. I know you can do it. Hang in there. My prayers are with you.
RJ is absolutely right--take it one step at a time and then get LOCKED IN with a group at a church who have been where you've been and know the WAY. You CAN beat it kiddo--and the best thing about you is that you're honest with yourself, you know yourself and you always pick yourself up and get back on track. Remember, everyone has sin in their life, and everyone struggles with something. Trouble is, some things are just more destructive and others no one ever sees--but people ALL struggle. The Apostle Paul talks about it too--"the things I know to do, I don't do, and the things I shouldn't do, I do." Isn't that how you feel sometimes? It sure is for me! WE're praying for you Tara--keep on keeping on!
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